Helping Children with Ill or Disabled Parents

A Guide for Parents and Professionals
Regular price £27.99
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When a parent falls ill or becomes disabled, the pressures placed on family, relations and friends can be very great. Children, in particular, are sometimes forgotten as the adults struggle to cope, yet often have to endure enormous anxiety. The authors, with compassion and common sense, look at the range of issues that can arise, including guilt, anger, frustration and fear. They suggest positive ways in which these can be approached, as well as looking at:

* what children need to know and when they should be told

* issues of dependence, separation and independence

* what issues emerge when other adults are involved

* the role of teachers and schools

* the sense of responsiblity commonly felt by the child

* how to help with thoughts and feelings.
  • Published: Sep 01 1996
  • Pages: 256
  • 234 x 157mm
  • ISBN: 9781853024092
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Press Reviews

  • British Journal Of Educational Psychology

    There is some particularly pertinent advice for schools. Some is very practical, focusing for example, on the need for schools to be accessible for parents with mobility problems so that they are able to fulfill normal parental roles at school functions. Other advice is more child-orientated, reminding us all that the child may need space to be alone sometimes. There is a very useful chapter including hints on how to talk to a child. The real merit of the book has to lie in its empahsis on diversity, the multitude of ways in which children cope with a parent's illness. The book offers a useful insight into the world of the child caring for a parent; it makes valuable reading for all those involved with children in this way. As such, it would make a specially useful addition to a staff library.'
  • Journal of Adolescence

    `Tapping into the emotional world of individual families helped form the rich sap and texture of this thoughtful and candidly written book. It does communicate the uncomfortable ambivalences and uncertainties of childhood and family life - messages that none of us should forget.'
  • Journal of the Association of Workers for Children with Emotional and Behavioural Difficulties

    `This is a book which will be of considerable value to all those who work with ill or disabled clients that have children, and those who work directly with children who have ill or disabled parents. In addition it will certainly be of significance to those families that are facing the everyday problems of coping with an ill or disabled parent. The text is very accessible and consists of fifteen chapters divided neatly into two parts. The strength of Julia Segal's and John Simkins' book lies in the open way that they explore the difficult negative emotions that many professionals, parents, and children often find difficult to confront. It will certainly be of great value to all those interested in helping young children and their families facing the problems of coping with ill or disabled parents.'
  • British Medical Journal

    `Incorporating a wealth of first hand experience, this book sets out what happens to children when their parents are too ill or disabled to parent in the imperfect, guilt ridden way of other parents. Physical as well as mental illness is encompassed in this book…'
  • National Association of Paediatric Occupational Therapists Newsletter

    `This book is a very open and honest look at a very sensitive issue…The book is very user friendly and would be valuable to parents and professionals working in this field.'
  • Child Psychology and Psychiatry Review

    `This book combines compassion and common sense in addressing the range of issues that are experienced when children find themselves frightened, angry, guilty, and frustrated by the pressure aroused when a parent becomes ill or disabled. The book is written in an easy, highly readable style… Speaking both as a schoolteacher and a lecturer of care workers, I found the book both enlightening and encouraging. It will certainly occupy a place in my list of required reading.'
  • Counselling Medical Division Bulletin (British Association for Counselling)

    eminently practical although I usually view with cynicism books which attempt to offer simultaneous guides for parents and professionals, ...on this occasion I compliment the authors on this successful integration. Perhaps its success is due to the primary focus on the needs of the children. Literature of this nature is sadly lacking and it is reassuring to find a book which focuses so clearly on the emotional needs of children. The introduction is clear and well rationalised. Key points are identified within the resum of the chapters which certainly stimulates further reading. The book is written in easy to understand language and offers anecdotes and case studies which brings the work to life. [It] manages to make complex ideas readily understandable withot being too simplistic or patronising to the reader. I found this book helpful and encouraging, in both a personal and professional way. Personally it helped me to work through my past experiences of being an ill mother, I am sure the book could help other parents in a similar way. As a professional, I found it useful that the authors had acknowledged that there are a wide variety of `helper' roles within these situations and the advantages and disadvantages of each are clearly discussed. The book offers alternative approaches to helping children which includes the use of symbolism, art and play therapy. This book would enable any health care professional to work effectively with children in this complex area. I feel privileged to have had the opportunity to review this book and make reference to it constantly within my counselling practice. I have no hesitation in highly recommending it to anyone involved in helping children with ill or disabled parents.'